Self-Care for Trauma Therapists and Clients: Managing Holiday Stress in Mental Health
By: Megan Osborne, Ph.D.
Self-care - the elusive mantra we were taught in graduate school…”take care of yourself so you can take care of your clients” they would say. Self-care is an interesting idea because more often than not…caring for ourselves as therapists is the very last thing we do. And…we end up learning the hard way. I have a quote hanging in my office that says “One thorn of experience is worth a whole wilderness of warning.” Safe to say, we’ve probably all experienced the thorn of forgetting the paramount need for self-care.
When we embrace the beauty of self-care we are giving not only ourselves and our brains a gift but we are modeling and showing up as the best version of ourselves for our clients. However, this can be especially challenging during the holidays for a number of reasons:
First: The amount of official days off puts pressure on our already tight client load/schedule.
We tend to try to pack everything and everyone in because, well, that’s what we do! But the one who ends up suffering in the end is the therapist. Make a schedule/plan that feels good to you going into the holiday months, one that works to incorporate your personal self-care rhythm…and stick to it. We are all cheering for each other in this one!
Second: Cancellations and no-shows are at their highest during holiday months.
This happens for a number of reasons (don’t we all learn the hard way those first few years in this space?) Everyone's schedules get crazy and our clients feel overwhelmed. The holidays can be a time where sometimes it’s easiest to put therapy on hold. Stick to your schedule that works best for you and gently remind clients of the importance of regular therapy especially during the holidays. And don’t feel guilty if you have to use no-show or late cancellation fees. Keeping your boundaries as a therapist is the essence of “self-care”.
Third: Holidays are just more challenging for clients and ourselves.
This is a unique season that brings out a deeper need to be intentional for our own “self care.” Showing up as the best version of ourselves during a time when clients need it most means more meaningful “self care” for us. This is your moment to check in with yourself…how are you doing in this area? Truly. Ask yourself. Personal self-care takes on many forms and colors and shapes for each of us individually. We find what fills our cup the best. One thing I do recommend…in our own personal EMDR therapy work, spend time with your personal therapist tapping in your “self care” modes as RDIs. These are our resources! For example my therapist helped me tap in holding a cup of tea as a resource. Now whenever I break and practice the self-care of sipping tea…it's deeper because I’ve resourced it and it resonates in a new neural network I have. Anyone live in a cold climate? Putting your favorite blanket in the dryer for 5 minutes and then wrapping up in it with some deep breathing…I’ve resourced that and it has become a beautiful winter addition to my self-care rhythm. These are a few of mine. What are yours? Resource them.
Finally, remember collectively we are all in this beautiful space together navigating the challenges.Discover practical self-care strategies for therapists during the holiday season. Learn how boundaries, planning, and EMDR resourcing support therapist well-being and prevent burnout.
A mentor of mine used to say…”Megan, don’t ever forget, you get to do this work.” It’s a privilege to enter into the healing world of another. Let’s not forget to incorporate self-care so we can continue to show up the best version of ourselves.
